Volume Six
… Alone …
Psalm 102 (KJV)
A Prayer of the afflicted, when he is overwhelmed, and poureth out his complaint before the LORD.
A Prayer of the afflicted, when he is overwhelmed, and poureth out his complaint before the LORD.
1 Hear my prayer, O LORD, and let my cry come unto thee. 2 Hide
not thy face from me in the day when I am in trouble; incline thine ear
unto me: in the day when I call answer me speedily. 3 For my
days are consumed like smoke, and my bones are burned as an hearth. 4
My heart is smitten, and withered like grass; so that I forget to eat my bread.
5 By reason of the voice of my groaning my bones cleave to my skina. 6 I am like a pelican of the
wilderness: I am like an owl of the desert.
7 I watch, and am as a sparrow alone upon the house top.
8
Mine enemies reproach me all the day; and they that are mad against me
are sworn against me. 9 For I have eaten ashes like bread, and
mingled my drink with weeping, 10 Because of thine indignation and
thy wrath: for thou hast lifted me up, and cast me down. 11 My days
are like a shadow that declineth; and I am withered like grass.
12 But thou, O LORD, shalt endure for ever; and thy remembrance unto all
generations. 13 Thou shalt arise, and have mercy upon Zion:
for the time to favour her, yea, the set time, is come. 14 For thy
servants take pleasure in her stones, and favour the dust thereof. 15
So the heathen shall fear the name of the LORD, and all the kings of the earth
thy glory. 16 When the LORD shall build up Zion, he shall appear in
his glory. 17 He will regard the prayer of the destitute, and not
despise their prayer. 18 This shall be written for the generation to
come: and the people which shall be created shall praise the LORD. 19
For he hath looked down from the height of his sanctuary; from heaven did the
LORD behold the earth;
20 To hear the groaning of the prisoner; to loose those that are appointed to
death;
21 To declare the name of the LORD in Zion, and his praise in Jerusalem; 22
When the people are gathered together, and the kingdoms, to serve the LORD.
23 He weakenedb my strength in the way; he shortened my days. 24 I said, O my
God, take me not away in the midst of my days: thy years are throughout
all generations. 25 Of old hast thou laid the foundation of the
earth: and the heavens are the work of thy hands. 26 They
shall perish, but thou shalt endurec: yea, all of them shall wax old like a garment;
as a vesture shalt thou change them, and they shall be changed: 27
But thou art the same, and thy years shall have no end. 28
The children of thy servants shall continue, and their seed shall be
established before thee. [5]
It is 3:28 am. I should be asleep, but here I am, writing my
epistle to you, beloved reader. No, I haven’t forgotten the series that I had
started, but this message is more urgent, for it is this message the Father has
woken me with. Let me begin…
It is eight years now since I was taken from the wilderness,
eight years plus a couple of months. I should be rejoicing – yet I am weary,
groaning if I may. If I was a practioneer of a twelve step program, I would
find it hard to describe what I feel today – a wariness of sin creeping into my
soul. I would stand before a group and they would want me to say the words:
“Hi, I’m Dave, and I’m
an addict.”
Now, these words are true in this sense: I am an addict,
only an addict for G-d. As far as a drug – of that I am free. In one group I
used to teach at, I would tell those that if a man or woman says in their
journey to becoming clean and sober “I’ve got 90 days being clean and sober!” I’d
tell them that’s all they have – 90 days clean and sober. But if the same
person could declare “I’ve got 90 days with the Lord!” – ahh – then they have
something, a good start on becoming free. Of course, I’d also have to tell them
the truth – that they have just enough G-d in them to make themselves dangerous
– I learned the hard way that a little time with G-d is good, but you start to
feel better, you start to think a little clearer, and you are prone to think
that hey, you can make it, when in truth, you
cannot – not without G-d and Messiah in your life full time. This lesson comes
home, even to someone as myself – eight years with the Lord – but groaning now
in my spirit because – I’m not spending enough time with
G-d.
Why? The old man I was is just skin deep away – one eighth
of an inch of skin holding him back from rearing his ugly stupid head up again.
Anyone who has suffered under the cruel task-master of sin and addiction that
cannot or will not admit this fact is only fooling themselves. We, those of an
addictive personality, must hold on and maintain that which freed us with the
tenacity of a bull dog – we must never let go. For me, that which saved me is
G-d, and I can only speak for myself – what has freed you – I hope and pray it
was also G-d. So why do I sit here talking about a turmoil in my soul? Because
I’ve let things get in my way, things of the world, the cares, the snares, the
distractions that scream at us all non-stop from all sides. I've tried to handle it alone.
The world. Face it; it is our greatest enemy, our biggest
challenge. We have to live in it – right now, not much choice in that. Till
Yeshua ha’Machiach returns, this is all we got. But the shrill voices out
there, they threaten our peace, our sanity even, and distract us from the truth
of G-d – which is exactly what the enemy of our soul counts on.
What is at the root of this distraction? Sin? I wish it was
that easy – but there is a deeper more insidious reason.
We feel alone.
Let me tell you something. Take a look around you. What is
the one emotion you see or feel the most in the people around you, or even
within yourself?
Anger? Fear? Hate?
Love? Something else?
I’m going to give you my observation – you can disagree,
that’s okay – what I see is loneliness. I see people who struggle, who go
through the day locked within themselves, alone. In a world of seven to eight
billion people, most feel alone. Now the list below is not to justify evil - but to serve as illustration:
The Islamic jihadist does his unspeakable crimes against his
fellow man not only because he is evil or cruel – he is alone.
The murderer, the criminal in all shapes and forms do what
they do because they are alone.
The pedophile, the deviant, they are alone.
The child is alone.
The widow or widower is alone.
The outcast is alone.
The wounded warrior is alone.
The soldier on the battlefield is alone.
The homeless and hopeless are alone.
Those sick are alone.
The elderly are alone.
The prisoner is alone.
The poor are alone.
The rich are alone.
The abuser and the abused are alone.
The black, the white, the yellow, the red, the brown: each
is alone.
The list is endless – but one truth remains.
We are all alone.
Locked within our own minds, even in a crowd, we struggle
alone with our fears, our cares, our worries, our sicknesses, our proclivities,
our sins… We brawl within our souls over every detail of our lives, looking for
just one way to get ahead of the curve, to find enough to eat, enough to cover
the bills, enough to satisfy our wants and needs. Again, being alone does not justify
doing wrong or doing evil – but it is the root of most the evil in the world,
the worst being the love of mammon, but being alone brings out all the rest.
We do unfathomable horror upon each other because there is
no quiet in our souls – just a gnawing that eats at our psyche, because we are
alone.
Now you may not agree – but from this darkness has sprung
all the horror that is unleashed upon the world today. Let me ask you this – if
a person felt the presence of a Holy G-d – and I mean the One, True, Merciful, Blessed
G-d of heaven – would they do evil, or would they suffer the fears that this
world brings forth?
If a man or woman knows – I mean really knows that they are
not alone in this world – that a presence outside of themselves if watching
closely at all they do – that they are accountable – how does that affect their
behavior? Is justice then sought? Is kindness, is mercy pursued? Would those
that have, truly reach out to those who have not? Would fairness, repentance,
hope be the norm, and not just bywords? Ask yourself – what defines the character
of a person? What they do in public, or what they do in private? Because there
are those who do not feel the weight of judgment of a Holy G-d upon themselves
for their actions, the acts both public and private are usually acts of vengeance,
hate, intolerance and:
Romans 1:18-32 (HCSB)
18 For God’s wrath v is revealed from heaven against all
godlessness and unrighteousness of people who by their unrighteousness suppress
the truth, w 19 since what can be known x about God is evident among them, y because God has shown it to them. 20 From
the creation of the world z His invisible attributes, that is, His eternal
power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what
He has made. a As a result, people b are without excuse. 21 For though they knew
God, they did not glorify Him as God or show gratitude. Instead, their thinking
became nonsense, and their senseless minds c were darkened. d 22 Claiming to be wise, they
became fools e 23 and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images
resembling mortal man, birds, four-footed animals, and reptiles. f
24 Therefore God delivered them over in the
cravings of their hearts g to sexual impurity, so that their bodies were
degraded among themselves. 25 They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, h and worshiped and served something
created instead of the Creator, who is blessed forever. i •Amen.
26 This is why God delivered them over to
degrading passions. j For even their females exchanged natural sexual intercourse k for what is unnatural. 27 The males
in the same way also left natural sexual intercourse l with females and were inflamed in their
lust for one another. Males committed shameless acts with males m and received in their own persons n the appropriate penalty for their
perversion. o
28 And because they did not think it
worthwhile to have God in their knowledge, God delivered them over to a
worthless mind to do what is morally wrong. 29 They are filled with all
unrighteousness, p evil, greed, and wickedness. They are full of envy, murder, disputes,
deceit, and malice. They are gossips, q 30 slanderers, God-haters,
arrogant, proud, boastful, r inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, s 31 undiscerning,
untrustworthy, unloving, t u and unmerciful. 32 Although they know full
well God’s just sentence—that those who practice such things deserve to die v w—they not only do them, but even applaud x y others who practice them. [6]
And:
1 Timothy 6:1-11 (NET)
6:1 Those who are under the yoke as slaves1 must regard their own masters as
deserving of full respect. This will prevent2 the name of God and Christian teaching3 from being discredited.4 6:2 But those who have believing masters must not show them less respect5 because they are brothers. Instead they
are to serve all the more, because those who benefit from their service are
believers and dearly loved.6 Teach them and exhort them about these
things.7
6:3 If someone spreads false teachings8 and does not agree with sound words (that
is, those of our Lord Jesus Christ) and with the teaching that accords with
godliness, 6:4 he is conceited and understands nothing, but
has an unhealthy interest in controversies and verbal disputes. This gives rise
to envy, dissension, slanders, evil suspicions, 6:5 and
constant bickering by people corrupted in their minds and deprived of the
truth, who suppose that godliness9 is a way of making a profit.
6:6 Now godliness combined with contentment brings great
profit. 6:7 For we have
brought nothing into this world and so10 we cannot take a single thing out either. 6:8 But if we have food and
shelter, we will be satisfied with that.11
6:9 Those who long to be rich, however,
stumble into temptation and a trap and many senseless and harmful desires that
plunge people into ruin and destruction. 6:10
For the love of money is the root12 of all evils.13 Some people in reaching for it have strayed from
the faith and stabbed themselves with many pains.
6:11 But you, as a person dedicated to God,14 keep away from all that.15 Instead pursue righteousness, godliness,
faithfulness, love, endurance, and gentleness. [7]
If your offended by the passages I just quoted, let me say
this: take it up with Paul and G-d. As for me, what and how a person lives, are
up to them – just be sure you’re right, it’s your eternal destiny at stake not
mine. But the point is the same – without the presence of G-d in one’s life –
they will do what they feel or think is right, because they have no fear of a
holy G-d – they are alone.
Being alone led me to 40 years in the wilderness. Before you
yell at me, I was the person in the above
passages. Everything spoken of in them? I was guilty of. Evil happened to
me at the age of thirteen - as most of you know from my testimony, I was raped –
thus I became alone. I lived that evil over and over in my mind – alone. I
dealt with it alone. Because of what I felt, what I had endured, my actions
became those of a person who cared not about the things of a G-d and I embraced
violence, drugs, and immorality. I was alone. I know of what I am speaking
today.
So then, what is my point? What turned me around and why do
I write this today? What turned me around was the supernatural encounter with a
risen Messiah. As I was struggling to overcome my addictions, in 2004 I had a
physical manifestation of the risen Savior. As I lay prostrate in an empty
church, more alone than I had ever been, Yeshua came to me. I never saw him –
but He took me in His arms – lash scarred arms and rough nail prints pulled at
the fabric of my shirt as He picked me up and drew my head to His chest, and I
felt and heard the beat of His heart. At that minute – I knew I was not alone.
It took another four years for me to process all that He was doing in my life –
but in 2008, the Son of Man set me free indeed; but it was the manifestation of
the Father that sealed the deal. I learned that day that Yahveh was real, that
His judgment is real, and that I either served Him or I would be lost and alone
forever.
Since then, my behavior changed. I know that I am
accountable. I also know I have fallen so short of the grace I was offered, but
His Torah leads me in His ways, and I am getting better.
But then, what are we doing in this world? What do I see
believers doing? We argue, we endlessly debate each other on so called “social
media” on the way to pronounce the name of G-d, of Law versus Grace, of Grace
versus Law, of Law and Grace; of Torah being done away with, of Torah still
being valid; of accusing Christians of following pagan rituals, of Torah
believers being legalistic. We shout at one another, hurl insults and get
offended – and the world is alone, we that should know better spend our time in
controversies instead of weeping for those that are alone. Instead of reaching
out to those alone and unlovable. We do in public and in private what we accuse
others of – and the world dies, and the lost are alone.
Then we engage in the tactics and things of this world –
left versus right, conservative versus liberal; Democrats are the KKK and
Republicans are Nazis; everybody’s wrong, nobody’s right. The poor are
oppressed by the rich, the rich take and take, ad nausea, ad nausea. Everyone
gets offended, young adults need “safe spaces”, only this type of life “matters”
when all lives matter, the unborn are sacrificed to Moloch and the world
demands more – blood upon blood.
And we are alone.
All retreat into their own minds, withdraw common sense and
curl up our souls because we are alone.
What will it take to stop this madness before there is no
hope or chance of return? There are a few that hear the cry of the lost, that
weep before their G-d, but it is few indeed. There are those that try to help,
but they are empty, they are alone in their souls also – few have experienced
the true G-d of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, and fewer still His Messiah. Some say
they have and use the Holy as a club – to these I can only say they are alone,
and for them I weep.
Yes, I weep. For myself first – for I have fallen short of
the Glory of G-d. For the lost I weep – for my heart is they know they are not
alone. For my nation I weep – for it has lost its way. For the world I weep,
for it knows not what it does.
Alas, I have no
answer. Only G-d. And in my soul – He is the only answer.
Please, please
brethren – stop what you are doing, seek His presence, seek Him.
We cannot do this
alone, weep for the lonely.
And that is my point.
There is only One
Alone who can take away our loneliness, and make us whole again.
May we all soon
return to Him and reach out to those alone in His Name Amein.
[1]
Authors
note: Use of information from Jewish-themed websites should not be
construed as these sites endorsing or confirming any thesis introduced by the
author of this epistle. I present the information from their respective sites
for instructional purposes only and/or to aid in the readers understanding of
the subjects discussed. The inverse is also true – by using these sites in no
way confirms or denies that this author holds to all things found on these
sites – but brethren, we all can learn from one another, Jew and Gentile; may
it be so in shalom and love and respect.
[2] Author’s note: Throughout this study I’ll be using the Net®
Bible and the Net® Notes: within the
notes you’ll see symbols like this:
( א B Ψ 892* 2427 sys).
These are abbreviations used by the NetBible© for identifying the principal
manuscript evidence that they (authors and translators of the NetBible©) used in translating the New Testament. Please
go to https://bible.org/netbible/ and see their section labeled “NET Bible Principals of
Translation” for a more complete explanation on these symbols and other items
pertinent to the way the NET Bible uses them.
[3]
Author’s
Note: In these studies I have used the notes that come along with
the passages I cite from the sources that I cite: these need a bit of a
disclaimer though. As in all things, not everything that is footnoted is
something that I necessarily agree with, especially if it contradicts what I
believe pertains to any matters of the Torah or the commandments of G-d. I
give you the notes as they are written by
the authors of the material I cite from, so that you can see the
information contained within them. It truly is not my place to edit or correct
them; if they state anything that is in opposition to what I teach, then so be
it. I will address these issues if requested, but for the sake of brevity (as
if any of these posts of mine are brief ☺
) I insert them and let them stand as they are. If I don’t agree with them, why
do I include them you might ask? I don’t believe in censuring anyone’s opinions
or scholarship; as I would not want mine censured, so I will not do to that to
another. As Rabbi Hillel once stated, “What is hateful to you, do not do to
another. That is the whole Torah. Go and learn it.” Torah
leads me to respect others, even if I disagree; it leads me to present
both sides of the coin, even if it could mean I’d lose part of the argument.
That is not to say I should not challenge something I believe contradicts the
truth of G-d’s word; that I will do in the main body of my epistles; that is
where my gentle dissent belongs. Most (but not all) of the differences will
come when I quote from the NET® Bible (but not exclusively); it has a decidedly
Western/Greek mindset to it, but as a wise man once said “How do you eat
chicken? Swallow the meat and spit out the bones…” I do though want to present
the NET® notes because there is a wealth of information and research contained
within them that I hope you find helpful.
[4]
One may wonder why I omit the “o” when I write the title “G-d”. While there are
many who say that to leave out the “o” is a sign of being under the influence
of the Rabbis who forbid saying the name of Yahveh, I say, one must come to a
conclusion on their own, and do as their heart convicts them (within the bounds
of G-d’s word of course). I believe in the power of the name of the Most High –
the name of Yahveh – and in uttering it in awe and reverence, yet find no
contradiction in my soul for the hyphenated title “G-d”. I have written it both
ways – stopped doing it, and now I have returned to the practice – as I said,
one must follow the conviction of their heart. I do not disrespect anyone
else’s opinion on this matter, and regardless if you think it wrong or right, I
ask for the same respect. Let each be fully persuaded in their own mind and
heart – and let G-d sort it out with each believer. For now, this is right for
me, till the Father corrects - or confirms; I am after all, a work in progress.
Shalom.
[5] The Holy Bible : King James Version.
1995 (electronic ed. of the 1769 edition of the 1611 Authorized Version.).
Bellingham WA: Logos Research Systems, Inc.
• The transliteration of a Hebrew word signifying that
something is certain, valid, truthful, or faithful; it is often used at the end
of biblical songs, hymns, and prayers.
·
[The
following notes are taken from the NET Bible® footnotes, copyright (c)
1996-2006 by Biblical Studies Press L.L.C. All rights reserved. Used by
permission from www.bible.org, n.d. Numbering system is unique to NET®
Notes. For more information, see
footnote #2and 3.]
1 tn Traditionally, “servants.” Though δοῦλος (doulos) is normally translated “servant,” the word does not
bear the connotation of a free individual serving another. BDAG notes that
“‘servant’ for ‘slave’ is largely confined to Biblical transl. and early
American times…in normal usage at the present time the two words are carefully
distinguished” (BDAG 260 s.v.). The most accurate translation is “bondservant”
(sometimes found in the ASV for δοῦλος), in that it often
indicates one who sells himself into slavery to another. But as this is archaic,
few today understand its force.
6 tn Or “those who devote themselves to service are
faithful and dearly loved” (referring to slaves who serve them).
9 tc Although most witnesses, including some early
versions and fathers (D2 Ψ M sy Cyp Lcf Ambst), have ἀφίστασο ἀπὸ τῶν τοιούτων (aphistaso apo’ tōn toioutōn, “stay away from such things!”) after εὐσεβείαν (eusebeian, “godliness”; thus, “who suppose that godliness is a way
of making a profit; stay away from such things!”), there seems to be little
good reason for this clause’s omission in some of the oldest and best witnesses
(א A D* F G 048 6 33 81 1175 1739 1881
lat co). It is likely that it crept into the text early, perhaps as a marginal
comment, but it should not be considered authentic in light of the strong
external evidence against it.
10 tc The Greek
conjunction ὅτι usually means “because,” but here it takes the sense “so that” (see BDAG
732 s.v. 5.c). This unusual sense led to textual variation as scribes attempted
to correct what appeared to be an error: D* and a few versional witnesses read ἀληθές ὅτι (“it is true that”), and א2 D2 Ψ M read δῆλον ὅτι (“it is clear that”). Thus the simple conjunction is preferred on internal
as well as external grounds, supported by א* A F G 33 81 1739 1881 pc.
12 tn This could
be taken to mean “a root,” but the phrase “of all evils” clearly makes it
definite. This seems to be not entirely true to life (some evils are unrelated
to love of money), but it should be read as a case of hyperbole (exaggeration
to make a point more strongly).
13 tn Many
translations render this “of all kinds of evil,” especially to allow for the
translation “a root” along with it. But there is no parallel for taking a
construction like this to mean “all kinds of” or “every kind of.” The normal
sense is “all evils.”
15 tn Grk “flee these things.”
·
End NET® Bible Notes
[7] Biblical
Studies Press. (2006; 2006). The NET
Bible First Edition; Bible. English. NET Bible.; The NET Bible. Biblical
Studies Press.
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